This morning I went to a get-together where it turned out that the ratio of men to women was about 12:1. Not a big deal normally, except I felt a bit of a bad vibe with this particular group. My creep radar went off. Super casual and I wasn’t anything special in jeans and tee, but some of the men were staring a bit much. I moved away, positioning myself more towards the women.
We’d only just arrived. I was engaged in a conversation with a fairly large group of people I didn’t know. One of the men in the group said he went for a hike with his friend the other day, and that he was experiencing envy.
Because, he said emphatically, “My friend has….
A REALLY YOUNG WIFE.”
Oh great, here it comes, I’m thinking. Same old shit.
He said that his friend was this many years younger than him, and his friend’s wife is THIS many years younger than his friend, and she is THIS!! many years younger than him …
I wasn’t following all of it as I darted through options in my mind about what to do next, but I think the number 10 came up, and definitely the number 20 did. I registered how impressed he was with the age difference in the tone of his voice.
And then, he actually said the following words to all of us,
“…And I was thinking, man, I WISH I could wake up next to someone WHO LOOKS LIKE THAT!”
After a brief pause, an awkward chuckle from the group perforated his next couple of sentences about his struggle to overcome envy. Hm. Surely it must be painful.
And then the next noise was me, not by my words as it wouldn’t have been worth it, but by movement. Swiftly, bruskly scooping up my bags, coffee, and sweater from the floor by my feet as fast as I could and racing the fuck out of there on the spot, right past them all. There’s no need to continue standing for this, for the sake of politeness and silently excusing such idiotic crap. I didn’t say a word and didn’t need to, as they all stopped to watch with question marks hanging out of their mouths. I could kinda feel some of them half open as if to speak, but I didn’t give it a chance.
Just outside the front door, I was already in the car before anyone could react. Off to do something better with my day, hopefully in more enlightened company.